sarahkeenihan

Day 358. I said no!

In August 2013 on August 4, 2013 at 1:20 pm

angry mum

I seem to say no! to my kids an awful lot.

No, you can’t play Wii unless it’s the weekend.

No, you don’t need over-packaged deep fried ‘portioned’ snacks in your lunch box.

No, you can’t have Coke at the movies.

No, I’m not buying you McDonalds for dinner.

No, you don’t need a Playstation.

No, you’re not wearing an off-the-shoulder-crocheted slouchy T shirt with something that resembles a bra underneath. You are eight.

I say no because I have strong feelings about what is healthy and reasonable for children. And although I know it can’t last forever, I hope that somewhere deep down it rubs off on them.

But sometimes I wonder if I’m just creating more work for myself.

Each weekend is spent negotiating and dividing screen time on a limited number of electronic items between three children.

Dinner time is often accompanied by food refusal and demands to know what is for dessert.

I battle with the little one to actually go and watch a sibling play sport without resorting to games on my phone after five minutes. It inevitably turns into a prolonged whining session by the kid, and me speaking from behind gritted teeth, searching for new ways to say,

“No! And stop asking me!”

I imagine other parents look at him as an eternal whinger, and me the constant nasty mother.

Perhaps I should just suck it up and give in?

Eat whatever you want.

Play electronic games in every spare minute, go on then.

Spend your money on lollies and super-sized bottle of soft-drink, yeah sure!

It’d be a hell of a lot easier in the short term.

[image thanks to Punk Toad on flickr]

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  1. I am very much in the same boat. Stay strong!

    I have read parenting experts talking about creating a home where you don’t need to say no. (For example…using redirection instead….or enough babyproofing so they can’t actually get into trouble) I can’t help but wonder if they actually had kids.

  2. Am hearing you loud and clear, especially this weekend. Cathy, those people who spout those strategies are either drunk, high or have never had kids. The psychology of no is a big issue in our house, and I’ve tried every damn distraction, redirection, engagement, motivation, reward,punishment system (except the naughty corner as she won’t stay there) known to man. But I can’t change the character of my 6 year old!

  3. Yep sometimes there is no way around the ‘no’. I have tried

    ‘stop asking me questions you already know the answer to’ and

    ‘if you ask me that again punishment x will happen’.

    They – especially number 3 – still ask. And I end up say (yelling?) NO.

    And yes Kirsti, I agree it is character dependent. I swear my 3yr old just loves picking fights….

    Age old problems I suspect đŸ™‚

  4. Love this post. I spent a lot of the weekend saying “no” to my kids too. I am sure my 8 year old asks questions just to hear a “no” response.
    e.g. “mum can I watch t.v?”
    me -“yes”.
    8 year old “but I already watched some this morning!”
    me – “ok, no then”.
    8 year old stomps out of room!?!?!

  5. that’s very funny hcrazy! and I know exactly what you mean. I’m sure my 3yr old does this as well – just loves picking fights, basically.

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